the snow has come.

so then

For whatever reason, I am a theology nerd. I like reading it, digesting it, talking about it. Actually, my whole family seems to be in the same boat. Just this summer, I was doing the dishes with my brother and out of nowhere, though I suppose he had been contemplating this for quite some time, he asked me what I thought was the purpose of prayer. "Statistics don't lie," he told me. Statistically, the success rate for healing in cancer patients is relatively low, despite consistent, passionate prayer. He challenged me further by noting that in scripture, God makes it clear that if we pray, he can move mountains. So, why then, doesn't he? My hands full of soap suds, my brain full of questions, my heart so wanting to love and defend, I could only give him this. And really, I should not say "only," because the ramifications of this truth run deep. If we look to Jesus sufferings, we see that he prayed, to the point of sweating blood, that the cup be removed from him; that he could walk away without having to endure the cross. BUT, he did have to endure the cross. He did have to die. And, this is the man, the God, we follow. If he is our greatest example, and if as our greatest example, he was called to suffer and die, and so that God might make his glory known, it should really come as no surprise that we too may be called to suffer so that his glory might be known.

And still, we wonder, but if he is all-powerful and loving and omniscient, why can't he just take the cancer away? And still, I wonder, is it possible that his way of moving mountains is by not eliminating all that plagues us? It is true that statistics don't lie. But, may I also suggest that the truths that they illuminate may do little to feed our hearts and minds if we do not conclude that the truth of Jesus supercedes all, and that there really is nothing that can come between us. No, not mere statistics.

If we are to accept our own interpretations of reality as Truth, we are really not allowing Jesus to reign supremely over all truths. In the Gospel of John, I find a verse that surely 'checks my derision.' Jesus tells the Jews, "If you abide in my word, you are my disciples, and you will know the truth and the truth will set you free." (John 8:31-32)

I think I must take a step back. I have a friend who had an interesting experience at church this morning. She walked in a little late, an usher greeted her, and sat her down in an avaible seat next to a woman and a young couple. Some time into the service, the woman moved from her seat next to my friend, and into a seat a couple rows up. My friend thought this a bit strange and immediatly went into self criticism mode in search of some viable explanation for this woman's behavor. As if that were not enough, the couple sitting a few seats beyond where the woman had been, also moved to the furthest end of the row, leaving my friend to again ask herself questions..."Do I smell bad? What is it?" And this is where many of us would stop. With the cancer patient who isn't being healed, we would ask, "God, do you even care?" We often stop before we allow the truth and purpose of Jesus to play its most necessary role. With only 20 minutes left of the sermon, another young couple entered the church in search of seats. There were now a few vacant seats next to my friend, which they took. Of course, we now speculate, sensing that perhaps God was at work, and that all along there had been a plan for the availability of seats next to my friend, who had a pleasant experience with the couple after the service. I realize that this example may seem trite in comparison to the healing of those seriously ill, but still I think it illustrates something. In prayer and in living, I know that I often expect to see tangible results of the thing I had been praying or living for. But so often, I pray for relationship, and instead I am hurt. I pray for clarity, and I become more confused. I pray for words and am often left speechless. But somehow, and only by God's infinite wisdom and grace, I end up loving him more as a perfect creator and father, without ever having attained, either in part or in full, all that I had so desired.


I think that we can probably so often identitfy with those that witnessed Jesus' death. "So, they killed your God, now what are you going to do? You have no God." What hopelessness! How often I view life like that! What I HAVE to remember is that a few chapters later, we read about the resurrection of Jesus. He is ALIVE! Did his prayer in the Garden of Gethsemane not move mountains!

The ultimate will for our lives is to be made more righteous and to increase in the wisdom and knowledge of Jesus. By whatever means, God pursues us and makes that possible. It may mean that his way of moving mountains is not that we are cured, or that we accomplish this or that. it may mean that we are so very suffiently humbled, that we see clearly our need for Him. It may mean that we must take an even greater interest in his love and grace, looking less to the needs of our physical selves, and more to the needs of a world so in need of Him. That is what He did. And, that is what changed the history of the world.